Danielle's eye

This happened once before. It was right after Danielle had returned from a trip to California with just her dad. She came home with a swollen eye.

The next day it looked worse, so I took her to the doctor. He had no idea what it was so he scheduled an appointment with a pediatric opthamaligist. That same evening of the first appointment, Camie was mauled by a dog. Spencer was 3 weeks old and we had just moved from out-of-state one week prior to that. It was one of those moments in your life when the whole world is spinning around you and you can barely breathe. A newborn, a daughter with stitches all over her face, the nighmares, and Danielle with some weard eye problem. Evan was helpful and took Danielle to the Opthamologist. He presecribed all different kinds of medications. Between Camie's 4 oral medications and Danielles several, I had to make a list and a schedule to keep it all straight. Plus, I was up all day and night with a newborn and hadn't been to church but once, so I didn't have any friends to call for help. I hardly remember any of it other then I survived. We all somehow survived.

So when Danielle's eye flared again, I knew what it was, but I couldn't remember for the life of me what medications she took last time around. I have since started keeping a hand-written medical journal (because coumputers crash). We moved away from the doctor we saw, and I didn't even remember his name. So here we go again. I took her to the pediatrician. I told the pediatrician it was a cold sore on her eye. I think she didn't quite believe me, but gave me the benefit of a doubt. She came back in and and said she needed to refer me to a pediatric opthamologist. I asked if it was Dr. M, and she smiled and said yes, why? That was the same doctor that Spencer saw two months before with his eye condition. She got me an appointment for the next day. And the next day in Danielle and I walk. The Doctor just smiled. I asked him if he had seen anything like Danielle's eye before. He said it is quite common, he sees it about once a month. He said Spencer's eye he sees about once in a lifetime, he will surely never see anything like that one again. He remembered us well. He looked at Danielle's eye and made sure it was not IN her eye. He said it really is not a big deal as long as it does not get IN her eye. If it gets IN her eye, it is a whole new ball game and very difficult. So, we needed to give her some antiviral oral medication, antibiotic eye drops, and erithromycin eye ointment to put on the fever blister. Heavy medication all for prevention, no wonder I didn't remember any of it. She will likely have breakouts the rest of her life, similar to the ones people get on their lips, just this is on her eye. And each time she breaks out, I have to immediately start all the medications to prevent it getting IN her eye.

This time Danielle was older and able to leave it alone, so the scarring isn't nearly as bad. Last time she had a red spot under her eye for almost a year. This time, a month later, and the red spot is almost gone. Hopefully it is another four years before she has another break-out.

Compression

Compression hose have become a big, important part of my life. I have nasty, painful varicose veins that start at my ancles and go all the way up my legs. Unless you have experienced them, you have no idea just how painful they can be. They make standing unbearable. I only have them during pregnancy and I must say they are one of the worst parts of pregnancy. I would endure labor once a week to have relief from the varicose veins. I discovered compression hose. They help a rememndous amount. On days where I just don't wear them, I am in pain and so tired. The blood is able to pool in my veins and so when I wear the hose, it doesn't allow the blood to pool, pushing it right back up to my heart and giving me more energy. I don't know how true that is, but I do know that I have much more energy when I wear them. And I don't hurt. Two problems to compression hose. I'm not sure which one is worse. First, I am pregnanct in the summer, all summer. Compression hose are think. They take a good five minutes to put on. And, the bending and stretching and trying to reach my toes to put on the hose on is so difficult with a big, huge round belly. I don't bend very well and so it is hard to put the hose on. I can't ask for help because they are so hard to put on. The first few times it took me a good ten minutes to put the suckers on. And the second bad part about compression hose is the cost. These hot constrictors run about $100/pair. Ouch. For a pair of hose. But, the benefit is worth it. So, I may not look to pretty wearing my shorts with hose. I may be hot, but I'm off the couch and I'm not in pain. And in a few months I will have a sweet baby and the varicose veins should dissappear. And I can say "adios" to the compression hose.

Note: this is not a picture of me.

What's the Weather?

My sweet little boy, Spencer, asks me the same question each morning, "Mom, what's the weather?" He never tires of the same answer, "what do you think the weather is?" He grumpily asks the same question again and I give him the answer. He then asks me, "does that mean I need short pants?" I love that little boy. He knows what the weather is, we check it out together a lot. We talk about it and discuss what kind of clothing gets worn with different kinds of weather. And he knows what shorts are, but he likes to call them "short pants". I don't know why. I think the weather might just be a morning conversation piece, because he often asks me questions that I know he knows the answer to. What can I say, the boy is unique! But I like it!

Bullfrog happenings

Evan found a bullfrog at work and brought it home to show the kiddos. It was so funny, I still laugh when I look at the pictures, especially the one of Taneal and the lack of one of Camie. The kids were so funny.

We had just finished 3 hours of swim practice and it was late, the kids needed to get into bed for school the next morning. We pulled up and Evan told me he wanted to show the kids something. Had a big Rubbermaid container with a lid on it. He asked them to all gather round to see what was in the box. Right as he lifted the lid, the bullfrog shot out of the container hitting Camie across the face, smack dab into the side of the car, and then flopped under the car. The kids had no idea what just shot out of the box. They all started screaming, especially Camie. Camie, Taneal, and Spencer all b-lined it into the house, leaving the garage door to the house open. Well, the car was parked in the garage that the bull frog was hiding under. As soon as it saw a clear exit, it hopped right inside the door and into the laundry room causing more shrill screams from the 3 kids inside. Evan was laughing so hard he couldn't really deal with the chaos. As soon as he realized it was going to possibly go behind the washer, Evan hurried and grabbed the huge frog and went outside. Nathan didn't know how to react. He really wanted to see the frog. It really was a cool frog, but the reactions of his siblings was confusing him. Evan held the frog and let each of the kids come touch it. Camie never would come out of the house. I think being smacked across the cheek by a jumping bullfrog would unnerve me, too. So that is why there is no picture of Camie with the bullfrog. After a few minutes of playing with the frog and watching just how far it would jump, they put it in the wagon, closed the lid, and took it down the end of the street and let it go in the retention pond.

Fun times.

The perfect picture

The title is a lot misleading. We were at a temple for my brother's wedding, a temple we had not visited before. I wanted to get a picture of my children in front of this temple to put into their temple scrapbook (the scrapbook I have intentions of creating). And so I lined them up, took photo after excruciating photo, and this is what I got. I finally got one with Nathan not trying to squirm out of the photo, only to look at it later and realize his finger was up his nose. I tried, right? I get credit for that. And when I do finally get around to creating that temple scrapbook, Nathan is just going to have to suffer the consequences of picking his nose. I have resigned to the fact that there is no such thing as a perfect photo when children are involved.

Happy 4th

I love holidays. Independence Day is no exception. I think what makes or breaks a holiday is the traditions established for that day. I remember hearing a conference talk years ago that really touched me, I can't remember who gave it, but it sticks out in my mind more then almost any other talk. The message I got was to establish traditions. Traditions are what children remember when they are old. They don't really remember all the day in and day out activities. When a child leaves home and holidays come around, they will be able to have either neutral, positive, or negative feelings about that day. It isn't about the money spent, they number of fire works bought, or birthday presents received. And so as I have become a mother, I have tried to follow the council from this conference talk and establish traditions in my family. On the 4th, I created little traditions such as painting flags on the girls' nails (sorry boys, when I established this tradition I didn't have boys). We also use construction paper and make flags and talk about the meaning of the flag. We always have some sort of dessert that we decorate to look like a flag. And the evening is spent with a few fireworks. Nothing grand, nothing expensive (we don't go all out on fireworks), but a few positive traditions that I hope my children always remember. When they leave home (I don't even want to imagine that) and the 4th comes around, they will have something to reminisce about, maybe even paint their own nails and decorate a fun treat like a flag. And maybe not, but at least we had a good time. I want to make the 4th of July special. I want my children to know that our Independence and freedom is a big deal. It is the birth date of our country and I am so grateful for the men who gave their lives for my freedom. Because if those men, I can worship how I choose, I can have as many children as my body and mind will allow, and I can go where I want whenever I want. I am proud to be an American and be free. God Bless America!

Charles and Amber

My littlest brother, Charles, was married on Friday to a wonderful girl, Amber. We were able to go to their wedding and spend a few days before with them. I love watching Charles and Amber together. They fit so well. Charles likes to joke and Amber pushes right back. They are so happy together. I am excited to watch them share their lives together. Congratulations Charles and Amber!

The day was preceeded by rain and flash floods. It rained the entire wedding day except for a few dry spells after the temple. I took a photo of the view from the temple looking at the grey skys. The pictures all turned out beautiful, you can hardly tell it was overcast.

Spencer turns 4

My biggest little boy turned 4! It was just 4 years ago that we moved to this great state, it was only 4 years ago that I thought I would only have a family of all girls (I didn't believe the ultrasound until I actually saw Spencer), and it was only 4 years ago that I held this newborn in my arms, now a mother of 4, and counted myself as the most blessed woman alive.

After having 3 girls, I got all kinds of comments from people about if we were going to try for a boy, etc. But the one comment that really sticks out is the one that said they wished a boy on me. They wanted me to have a boy so I would know what a real boy was like, how energetic, crazy, and scary boys could be along with all the burping and gross stuff that goes with them. And then came Spencer. Spencer is probably the best kind of boy I could possible ask for. Evan of course calls him a "putz", but I call him wonderful. He is every woman's dream. He is kind, careful, thoughtful, emotional, smart, logical, sweet, cuddly, and likes to pick out his clothes. The thing I love about Spencer the most is how sweet he is. He thinks about others. He is so considerate of others. He does get mad sometimes and hits his little brother, but Nathan well deserves it even though Spencer still gets into trouble. Spencer has fear. He won't do dangerous things because he knows he will get hurt. The thing I feared the most about boys was how dangerous they can be. I have 5 brothers, I know. But Spencer came to me just about as perfect as can be and can sure melt my heart. He is still boy through and through, but the sweet kind that whoever he marries will be the luckiest girls alive.

Spencer like to pick out his clothes. I think it is so funny because boys aren't supposed to do things like that, right? His favorite shirts are the ones with the mean dinosaurs or animals on them. Following after 3 girls, Spencer has had to adapt a lot of our toys. He zooms the barbie cars around, likes the Barbie movies that have animals in them, and has taught his sisters how to wrestle and climb. He has more questions then any child I have ever met. He was on a coyote kick for about 6 months and occasionally still asks about them. He asks all about bugs and spiders and raccoons and other nocturnal animals. He thinks it is so cool that his name starts with an "s" because it looks like a snake. He has asked 100's of questions about the Holy Ghost, His purpose, role, and influence. He continually asks about following the prophet and going astray (he says is straight) stimulated by a song he learned in Primary. My favorite question was the one about how that baby is going to get out of my belly. Of course being 3 I didn't want to tell him how it came out, so I tried to get out of answering the question but Spencer would have nothing to do with that. I finally told him to wake Dad up (who was sitting on the other couch) and ask him. And Evan point blank told him. Spencer's jaw dropped open and then he crinkled his nose and looked right at me and said, "that is disgusting!" And the subject was over. He hasn't brought it up again. He is still fascinated with . . . how do you say it? My bosom. He hasn't forgotten how Nathan got his milk when he was a baby and he likes to point out that that it is the same way he got his milk. He seems quite proud of it. And in years from now he will probably die that I am even sharing this. But it is a frequent topic and he points out a lot that the new baby will get it's milk that way too. Occasionally he will pat them and tell me how cool they are. I try to be mater-of-fact with him and think the scientific way that he is I'm sure thinking. It still just cracks me up.

My little boy isn't so little any more. For his birthday he got a bog boy bed and moved out of his toddler bed. Spencer tried not to smile but was very excited. We had a swim meet the afternoon/evening of his birthday, so I quickly made him a cake and we took it to the meet with us and sang Happy Birthday to him there. He wanted donuts for breakfast. We had his favorite supper on Sunday with Troy and Becky which consisted of baked chicken strips, mashed potatoes, biscuits, and cooked carrots. On his actual birthday we let him pick out a dozen balloons, he wanted only green and blue. We sang happy birthday to him so many times throughout the day that Nathan can now sing it. I think Spencer felt special and really enjoyed his day.

Lazy Momma

I really shouldn't call this post lazy momma because I haven't been lazy at all. At least in some areas. My kids got the better of the OCD problem that I sometimes have after I had baby #4. I have given up on so many things and let go on so many more things. This morning is a good example of of just what I am talking about.

Evan left with Taneal and Camie at 6am this morning for a swim meet. Danielle had throwing up and fever yesterday, so she was not able to go. I couldn't sleep last night, but not from lack of trying. I laid there trying to convince my body to sleep and my mind to stop, but I just wouldn't obey. This morning I couldn't get out of bed. I finally did at 7am because Nathan wouldn't quit coming in and telling me he was poopy. I was hoping the dirty diaper would just go away, but it wouldn't until I finally changed him. Then I was up. My little 3 do not eat cereal. I have to cook for them each morning if I don't want to feed them an hour later. With Taneal and Camie gone, I didn't need to cook much, so I opted for the toaster and pop tarts. I NEVER give my kids pop tarts for breakfast. It isn't the sugar, I don't mind that. It is the mess that comes with it. Any time we have pop tarts, somehow that jelly ends up on my floor and smashed and spread into a sticky mess. We have an eating-only-at-the-table rule, but somehow pop tarts just plain make a mess. And then came my bright idea. Eat the pop tarts outside. Nathan was all for it. Danielle and Spencer looked at me funny and then asked if I was serious about them going in the backyard in their pajamas. I figured what the heck, get out there and leave your mess to the fire ants. Plus, Spencer drank too much last night and desperately needs a bath and I don't want to give it to him just yet. That was at about 7:30 this morning. I threw some juice boxes and water bottles outside along with some fruit. The house was so quiet! And of course I couldn't start any fun projects because as soon as I did they would be done playing outside and then I would be frustrated that I had to put my project away. So, I decided to tackle the mountains of laundry. Around 10 they decided they were done, so I suggested turning on the hose. It is now 11:53 and they are still outside playing in their pajamas (I did have to remove the over saturated diaper off Nathan and replace it with Spencer's underware from the laundry). I need to fix them lunch, hopefully they will stay outside and eat that too. And, I have the last load of laundry in the dryer, all the other clothes on hangers and folded, most of it put away. My floors are picked up and there has been quiet in my house all morning. Oh, what a beautiful day. It is noon and I am not even close to feeling frazzled.

As I was looking outside, it cracked me up that they were still in their pajamas. Lazy mom in that I didn't get them dressed to go outside. But, it is in the back yard, I won't have as much laundry to do because they didn't get a set of clothes wet plus their pajamas. And I really haven't been lazy at all. I thought about reading a book in the quiet, but decided that I would be much happier later if the laundry was done. And I am feeling good already. I'll save the book for another much needed time, enjoy the children who have played their heart out for the last 4 hours and will hopefully want some down time. Maybe we will get dressed today. Probably. And maybe I should just throw a bottle of shampoo into the backyard and see if they can wash their hair outside instead of . . . No, just kidding. I couldn't serously do that. It was a fun idea though.

Here's to a hot summer day, mom of 5 with another on the way, style!

School pictures

A little late, but here are the girl's school pictures that I somehow managed to forget to post. It must have been sometime this winter. That's the only excuse I have:

Swim Team

We did swim team again this year. Danielle joined in. Spencer tried, but wasn't quite able to swim the length of the pool, so hopefully he can do it next year. It was a lot of fun.

Sour Green Spring Soccer

I'm a little late in this post, but so is everything in my life. February, March, and April were a blur. I was so sick and exhausted I lost my will to do anything. The pregnancy hit me in full force the last week of January and it was all I could do to get out of bed each morning and get my kids off to school. As soon as the girls were at school, I laid on the couch with a blanket and felt like I was going to die. Nathan and Spencer became way too acquainted with Dora the Explorer and Diego. I was downright miserable. I was failing in every aspect. I couldn't take care of my children, didn't have enough energy to do any kind of cleaning, and my dear friends brought in meals so that my family could eat. Each pregnancy is a little different although I get sick with each one. I can endure two months of sickness because I really want each child and I feel so strongly that having another baby is what I am supposed to do. I love each one of my children so much and I can't imagine life without them, even if the pregnancies are tough. And usually when I hit 15 weeks, I feel much better, still tired, but I can once again enjoy life and my children and I can then get excited about the new arrival preparing it's way. With Nathan it was different. I did get a little better around week 20, but was throwing up the entire pregnancy. I didn't think I could handle another pregnancy like that one. I guess it wasn't so much if I could handle another pregnancy that sick, but could I do that to my family? I can deal with 9 months of fatigue and throwing-up, the end result is so worth it. But my family really suffers. Evan really suffers, although he tries his hardest to be compassionate and supportive. But that only goes so far with no clean clothes, no food in the pantry, no clean dishes, and children that are completely neglected. My mom came for a week and helped out. I was so thankful. My dad came during spring break to play with the kids while they were off from school. So wonderful. And my sister came one weekend and made 20 freezer meals so we would have something to eat around here. I was so thankful for the help because I really could not do it myself. I remember being out of milk for several days and finally just making myself get up and go to the grocery store. I pulled into the parking lot, unloaded Nathan and Spencer, walked to the back of the store and grabbed a gallon of milk. I lifted the milk to the cart and as I went to lift another gallon, I stopped and decided I did not have enough energy to pick it up let along put in on the conveyor belt, again into the cart, into the car, out of the car, and into my fridge. One gallon of milk was going to have to suffice until Evan could get us more. I was too exhausted. I beat myself up over how selfish I am to want another baby when I know what pregnancy does to us. But, I knew not only did I want another baby, but I was supposed to have another child. And so I hoped and prayed that the sick part of this pregnancy would last only two short months and then we could go on. Week 15 hit and I was still violently throwing up. Week 18 hit and I resigned to the idea that this pregnancy would go like the last, the entire 9 months. And then week 20 hit and I suddenly felt better. I was still nauseated, but I quit throwing up. I actually had some energy to cook dinner. I was able to go shopping and get Danielle some new shorts that fit. Life was slowly returning. Heavenly Father was helping me when He knew I could not endure any longer.

And so you probably are wondering why the title of this post is Spring soccer and why am I going on about myself. I don't think I will ever forget this Spring soccer 2010. It started the first week of February, right as the rough part of the pregnancy was hitting. I signed Taneal, Camie, and Danielle all up the first week of January, before I knew I was pregnant. 3 kids. Each a game every Saturday and one practice a week. And it was cold. I could not get warm. I had the temperature set in my house at 78 degrees and I was still freezing. Practice was so cold that I was shivering while the kids didn't even need jackets. And Nathan would not stay close. He was everywhere, trying his hardest to help me get my exercise. So, after 15 minutes of the first practice, we sat in the van while Camie had her practice on Monday night, Camie and Danielle both on Thursday night (for 2 hours, 1 hr each), and Taneal Friday night. And then 3-4 games every Saturday. I would have just quit with Danielle and Camie, but if we quit the team would have had to forfeit because there weren't enough players. I didn't know any of the other players who could help me out, so we endured. Taneal LOVES soccer, and so I could not stop. I knew several of the parents on Taneal's team who so graciously helped me with many of the practices and games. It was a very long season, one I never wish to repeat. But we endured. Thanks to my little brother, Charles, who put movies on my ipod so my children had something to do while we waited in the car during practices.

I must quite with the pessimism. I feel so much better now. My children learned to cook and clean. They are still playing. We cancelled the tv so Nathan and Spencer can learn to do something else. And we successfully made it through one season of soccer. Just because I stopped, they still continued. And they still love me. So here is to Spring soccer. And the blog entry is part of a journal, my journal. From my perspective. I do not write it in hopes of sympathy, I do not want any. I write it to document life and the ups and downs that we all have. Spring was both up and down for me, down because my body just does not like pregnancy, but up because I have been so blessed with this little life within me. I am excitedly waiting the arrival of this beautiful baby who will bless my life and the lives of those already part of my family.

Oh, and we missed Taneal's team picture, and I didn't pull out the camera to get my own pictures. I should not have bothered with Camie's team pictures because many from her team were not there, her coach included. I have no idea who the lady is standing in as the coach. Camie sure looks beautiful. And this was Danielle's first season to play. She was so cute, with her girly run. She would occasionally kick the ball, but was not aggressive in ANY way. I photoshopped the pictures to take out the name and locations. And even if next season I feel well, (which I will because I won't be pregnant) I don't think I want to EVER sign that many kids of for soccer again.